Getting Real with Kira Hazledine
I did not nest with my first child. People kept asking me if I was getting the urge to clean and prep for my firstborn. Apparently, nesting is some sort of maternal instinct that encourages mothers to prepare for their new bundle of joy. With Hallie, though, I didn’t even have the urge to get off my ass. Good thing my husband was around to put everything together, because otherwise, Hallie would have come home to a bunch of boxes.
I was about 38 weeks before I decided that I should probably get things somewhat sorted. Even then, I had zero motivation to create a nursery or do anything beyond setting up the bassinet. Oh wait, someone else did that too. If I’m honest, I barely packed a hospital bag. I had nothing I actually needed, and Hallie didn’t have enough outfits for our short hospital stay. Mom fail on day 1.
So, what is this nonsense? I. Can’t. Stop. Cleaning.
It’s borderline obsessive. One project leads to five more, and it continues like I had started an avalanche of chores. I’ve cleaned and reorganized my own room, Hallie’s room, and then I’ve cleaned things that I don’t think I bothered to clean when Hallie was born. Sorry, Hallie. I don’t know what the difference is, but I promise I was excited for you, too.
Although it’s a bit annoying, nesting with baby #2 does have its benefits. Hallie is already my big helper. We are talking a lot about what having a new baby is going to be like and what that means for her. We talk about how to be gentle, and where Hallie fits in the midst of all these baby items. This gives her the opportunity to explore things like the swing and bouncer before there is a baby actually in them.
It’s not a bad idea to nest early with the second child, because there are a lot of changes happening. Hallie’s whole room is being rearranged, and I’m cleaning toys like a mad man. Hallie is very excited to share toys that used to be hers, because she helped in the process of cleaning. I’m also learning what toys I can’t pull aside and just give to her new brother, because it would probably cause a total meltdown. This is good stuff to know beforehand.
One last benefit is the extra time I’ve allowed myself. I’m tired, and my toddler keeps me busy. Cleaning takes a lot longer when I have my helper, but I still have 2 months before my impending due date. I don’t feel the need to rush, and I can spend all the time with my big helper that I need.
I didn’t nest with Hallie, but I am feeling it now, probably because of Hallie. I will have two children to care for, and I want to offer them equal love and attention. Having everything set up beforehand will help, and the more conversations Hallie and I can have, the better adjusted she will be to a sibling. I hope.