Getting Real with Kira Hazledine

Bedtime is supposed to be this nice, relaxing time between the parent and the child, right? Everyone snuggled up together, reading some stories, and watching the little one slowly drift to sleep. Except not. Not in this house. Bedtime is the witching hour around here, and this mom is about to tap out.

As we approach bedtime, Hallie finds this to be the perfect moment to run through the house. It’s as if her brain is trying to tell her that she might be a bit tired, but the rest of her must insist that it’s all a lie. Ok, fine. We wrangle her into pajamas as she jumps on the bed and laughs, and if I’m really moving too slow, I end up chasing a naked toddler through the house in the middle of a diaper change.

Once pajamas are on, we spend some time brushing teeth and encouraging Hallie to not use her toothbrush on every other bathroom surface, because, gross. Then I watch her drag one foot down the stairs as slowly as humanly possible before she blows goodnight kisses to everyone.

Sweet, right? No. This is just the beginning.

My husband and I alternate nights when we put Hallie to bed, and I can usually guarantee that it will take me longer. Sometimes, an hour longer. Maybe I’m the “soft” parent, and it’s something I’ve done. It doesn’t matter though, because my husband is about to be on bedtime duty every night.

The reading of bedtime stories is about the same regardless of which parent is reading, but that is where the similarities end. With Daddy, Hallie wants to watch a couple of YouTube videos and she’s asleep in a matter of 10 minutes. With Mommy, Hallie wants titties (our delightful term for breastfeeding). Hallie is day weaned, so the nighttime is one of her favorite parts of the day. Hallie nurses to sleep with me, and she will have nothing else. She does not want songs or music videos, or an extra story, or an extra cuddle. Titties. Toss and turn. More titties. Talk about some stuffed animals. More titties.

And it can take more than an hour.

So finally, I tapped out the other night. I brought Hallie to my husband, and I went to shower. Hallie fell asleep within 5 minutes, and I could not even handle the irritation. I love quiet moments with my daughter, but at the end of the day, I just want to be done. I honestly can’t wait until her second birthday when we night wean this child as well, because bedtime has to get easier. If it doesn’t, it won’t be my problem anymore. It will be Daddy’s, because this Mom is leaving bedtime to the apparent toddler whisperer.