Getting Real With Jana Jeffery

Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror for the first time in the day, at 3pm, and realized that you didn’t just forget to put makeup on one eye, which happens more often than is comfortable to admit in mixed company, you forgot to put it on … all together? Hello sleepy, puffy-eyed Frankenstein mom!

I don’t usually wear a lot of makeup. A small amount of eye shadow and eyeliner is as far as it usually goes, time permitting. My eyelids are generally in a perpetual state of red and puffy. Plus, I have almond shaped eyes that shrink to slits when I smile. So if I forget to put on this minimal amount of makeup, like I have the past two days, all I hear is, “you look so tired” and “are you coming down with something?” Of course I respond in the most subtly indignant tone that I can muster: “no, no I’m not, this is me au naturel…”

Muwahahaha.

The truth is, I’ve been waking up late in the morning. Which is most likely because I’ve been staying up a little too late and taking Nyquil – “the nighttime, sniffling, sneezing, aching, coughing, stuffy-head, fever, so you can rest [and sleep through your alarm] medicine.”

Jana and her youngest daughter, Hannah

I take half the recommended dose for my evening stuffiness; violently crush the crowing rooster alarm ringtone when it goes off at 6am; and fall blissfully back to sleep. Did I mention that I have two school-age kids and that I’m married? Well, I am, and my husband will let me sleep through it all. Then, he’ll send one of them in to wake me up. Oh how they love to wake up mommy. It’s more like, make fun of mommy for doing the thing they get so much hell for: getting up to their alarm. Being taunted awake by your children is so much fun, and such a great way to start the day (insert sarcasm.)

Honestly, I barely have time to feed the dogs, get dressed, pack our lunch, finish getting the last kid ready, and then brush my teeth and hair before we’re racing out the door by 720ish. Taking a few minutes to put on a dash of makeup is simply time that I don’t have.

Fast-forward 7.5 hrs and there I am, standing in the ladies room at the office, taking stock of my appearance. Ticking off the checklist of things I forgot to do that morning… tweeze my eyebrows, put on makeup (or at least cover up), put in the other earring (yep, that happened), wear matching shoes… sadly the list goes on. I’ll spare you. But, I resolve to the fact that it’s 3 o’clock; I’ve already seen almost everybody I’m going to see today. Screw it, better luck tomorrow.

Then, tomorrow comes: rinse, repeat.

Why don’t I stop taking the Nyquil you ask? Well, I would, but I’m pretty sure sleepy, puffy-eyed Frankenstein is better than the drooling zombie walker.

Maybe.