Getting Real With Shadra Bruce
We try to teach our children (and remind ourselves) that negative emotions and thoughts impact our attitudes and mental health. Happiness begins with a shift in mental perception. Here are 10 tips for conquering negative emotions:
1. BE PRESENT
I don’t know where it came from, but almost 20 years ago I heard a saying that stuck with me: “If you stand with one foot in yesterday and one foot in tomorrow, you’ll pee all over today.” I’ve tried to live by that. You can’t change the past, you can’t predict the future. You can only enjoy today, this moment, right now.
Forgiveness is a gift to yourself not to the other person. Holding grudges or hate only hurts you and not the other person, letting negative emotions and feelings poison you. Let it go.
3. REASSURE YOURSELF
It’s ok to have conversations with yourself to tell yourself that everything will be ok. Practice taking deep breaths, calming your mind, refocusing your energies.
4. POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS WORK
The inner dialogue you have with yourself can be your worst enemy. You would never talk to someone else the way you might talk to yourself. It takes time and practice and effort to change that, but positive affirmations help. Start each day telling yourself something positive: “I am beautiful.” “This will be a wonderful day.” “I am happy.” Repeat throughout the day, especially whenever you hear inner self become negative.
5. CHANGE YOUR OUTLOOK
The point of the half glass full/half glass empty analogy is that there is the same amount of water in the glass. What changes is how you look at it. Start seeing things more positively, even if you have to force it or fake it at first.
6. DO NOT FEAR CHANGE
Negative emotions can be signals that we are ignoring messages from our bodies and minds. Rather than wallow in it, recognize the sign, embrace the need for change, and become excited about the adventure that life can be.
7. LET GO OF RESENTMENT and ANGER
Holding on to resentment and anger is like carrying poison in your body all the time. You must make a conscious effort to let go of negative feelings, to practice banishing them from your thoughts whenever they arise. Sometimes, you may have to physically confront a person or reason for your anger or resentment.
8. NO DRAMA ALLOWED
Why are reality shows so popular? Because people are addicted to drama. Some people learn to wallow in the drama of their lives so that when it’s not there, they must create it. STOP. It’s ok for life to just be. Don’t exaggerate the situation, don’t waste time feeling sorry for yourself. Start appreciating the small moments and details of your life.
9. GIVE OF YOURSELF
It is hard to be negative when you are doing nice things for others. Volunteer, spend time with a friend, do something nice for a neighbor. The more you do that brings positivity into your life, the happier you will feel.
10. LOVE YOURSELF.
Be happy with who you are, not in spite of whatever imperfections you still see but because you are you and you are amazing and you deserve your love.
Life is a journey. Enjoy the adventure!